


The Confusion of Ms. Johnson

by jasonsbarmitzvah (jemscarter)



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 09:19:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13120761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jemscarter/pseuds/jasonsbarmitzvah
Summary: Ms. Johnson didn't think she had to ask which of Jason's fathers she was getting when she called home, but apparently, she did. (Or, Jason's teacher is confused as different men keep coming to pick him up saying they're Jason's father.)





	The Confusion of Ms. Johnson

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt on Tumblr for anything with Jason & his three dads.

**i. (September 1979)**  
  
Ms. Johnson had seen many things in her time as a middle school teacher, but her confusion about the kid sitting in front of her was reaching a new level.  Jason Shapiro had seemed well-behaved and mild-mannered from what she’d seen in the first few weeks of homeroom, until this moment when one of the other teachers dragged him into her classroom saying he had hurt another student.

“Jason, you’re not the type of kid I expect this kind of trouble from.”

Jason shrugged.

“Mr. Calloway is claiming you threw a book at Charlie York’s head.”

Jason stayed silent.

“Did that happen?”

“I guess so.”

“And now Charlie York might need stitches.”

Jason shifted his gaze to his feet.

“Is there a reason you threw a book at his head?”

Jason continued his silence.

“I’m going to have to call your parents in order to discuss next steps.”

At this Jason snapped his head up, his mind flashing to his mother’s barely concealed breakdowns over the breakup of her marriage, “Please don’t call my mom.”

Ms. Johnson looked at the kid sympathetically before beginning to dial, eventually reaching Trina’s voicemail machine.Ms. Johnson looked back at Jason’s student file and saw another number scrawled at the bottom, which she figured must be his father’s work number.  The phone rang for a few beats before a male voice picked up, “Hello?”

“Hello yes this is Ms. Johnson down at the school, is this Jason Shapiro’s father?”

There was silence on the other line which Ms. Johnson took as a sign to continue talking.

“He threw a book at another student, he needs to be picked up for the day.”

“I’ll be right there,” the man said hanging up the phone.

“Your dad is on his way,” Ms. Johnson told Jason before turning back to her grading.

Jason sat there waiting nervously for Marvin to show up, wondering how he would react to Jason’s outburst.  Jason knew he shouldn’t have thrown the book but Charlie had been yelling about how Jason was bound to end up fucked in the head like his father and Jason had just seen red and done the first thing he could think of to shut him up.  He knew that was something Marvin would’ve done too, so maybe he was more like his dad then he thought, maybe—

Jason’s thought process was cut off by the door swinging open to reveal a tall man in sunglasses and a letter jacket who was definitely not Marvin Shapiro.

“You made excellent time Mr. Shapiro, please, do come in,” Ms. Johnson said, leading Whizzer over to a chair next to Jason.

“Hey kid,” Whizzer said, lowering his sunglasses to wink at Jason.

Jason stared back at him, unsure of how to react to the lucky twist of fate that brought Whizzer to the school in the place of his parents.

“So, Mr. Shapiro, as I said over the phone, Jason threw a book at another student, who may now have to have stitches.”

“Is that so,” Whizzer said in a lofty voice, sinking into what Jason recognized as Whizzer’s Marvin impersonation.  Whizzer usually only pulled it out to mock Marvin at family dinners when Marvin acted particularly aggravating.

“I’m not sure what provoked the attack, and Jason has been less than forthcoming.”

Whizzer simply raised an eyebrow.

“Since it’s his first offense, I can let him off with a warning, but I do have to suspend him for the rest of the day.”

Jason’s eyes dropped quickly back to the ground, he knew when his parents found out about this they were going to kill him for getting suspended, which would only lead to more fighting and arguing.

“I understand,” Whizzer nodded solemnly, “Jason, let’s go.”

Jason stood, grabbed his bag, and followed Whizzer back to the car, where Whizzer turned to him with a giant smile.

“Pretty good Marvin impersonation huh?”

Jason shrugged and Whizzer dropped the smile.

“I gotta tell ya kid, throwing a book at someone’s head is not what I expected when I picked up the phone.”

“Sorry,” Jason mumbled.

“Did the kid at least deserve it?” Whizzer asked.

Jason nodded.

“Alright, then don’t do it again and all that, ok?”

Jason nodded again.

“Great, then how about we grab some ice cream, walk around the park, and I’ll drop you back off near the school in time for you to walk home and pretend this never happened?”

Jason turned to look at Whizzer, “Really? You’re not going to yell at me?”

“I think you’ve gotten enough yelling for the past year. Besides, if that teacher actually believed that I was Mr. Shapiro I think I deserve an ice cream for my performance, and you have to be there to present me with the Ice Cream Acting Award of the Day.”

Jason cracked his first smile of the day at Whizzer’s joke, “I can do that.”

“There’s no one else I’d trust with the task,” Whizzer said, leaning over to ruffle Jason’s hair before putting the car in drive and heading towards the ice cream shop.  

* * *

  
**ii. (June 1980)**  
  
“Jason, do you know why I’ve called you in here today?” Ms. Johnson asked, staring down at her once star pupil.

Jason shook his head.

“Jason, you haven’t turned in any of your assignments in the last month or so.”

“So? School’s almost out anyway.”

“Yes, but that also means final grades are due, and without those assignments you’ll fail. I sent a note home with you two weeks ago for your parents, did you show it to them?”

Jason stayed silent, which Ms. Johnson correctly took as a resounding no.

“I’m going to have to call them then to discuss this, take a seat.”

Jason sat down and stared out the window at the kids leaving for the day.  He had considered giving the note to his mother, but she had been busy with wedding planning, and he hadn’t seen Marvin much since ‘that night’ with the wedding invitation, and when he did finally see him he had just broken up with Whizzer and Jason was scared to upset him.  

The phone rang and Jason heard a low voice on the other end.

“Hello?”

“Hello, yes, this is Ms. Johnson at the school, I have your son Jason Shapiro here?”

“Yup, he’s my son,” the voice on the end said.

“I’m going to need you to come down to the school to discuss his grades. As soon as possible.”

There was some other conversing that Jason couldn’t hear before Ms. Johnson hung up and told Jason his father would be there any moment.

Within a few minutes a short man in a sweater walked in the door.

“Hello, this is Ms. Johnson’s classroom yes? I just got a call to come in and discuss my son, Jason,” Mendel said, a giant smile stretching across his face at being able to call Jason his son even though he was there under less than ideal circumstances.

“I met Jason’s father earlier this year, and you are definitely not him,” Ms. Johnson replied suspiciously.

Mendel laughed nervously, “That must’ve been Marvin.”

Ms. Johnson continued to stare at him in confusion.

“I’m Mendel Weisenbachfeld, Jason’s stepdad,” Mendel said stepping forward to shake Ms. Johnson’s hand.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize-“

“Quite alright, let’s discuss Jason’s grade, shall we?” Mendel said sitting down next to Jason.

“Yes, well, he hasn’t turned in any homework in the last month, and without those assignments, I’ll be forced to fail him.”

“Right, right.”

“If he could get the assignments turned in before the end of the year he should be able to pass without a problem, although I will have to deduct some for lateness.”

Mendel nodded, “Of course, he’ll get them into you A.S.A.P. Pronto. With haste.”

“Right,” Ms. Johnson said, shaking hands with Mendel one last time before dismissing the two.  
“Jason, why haven’t you been doing your homework?” Mendel asked when they got to the car.

Jason shrugged and Mendel sighed.

“Look, bud, I know it can be scary with a lot of transition in your life-“

“This isn’t therapy.”

Mendel chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, “No, it’s not. I know the last few months have been strange, moving to a new house, the stuff with your dad-“

“Dad kicking Whizzer out.”

Mendel nodded, “Your dad kicking Whizzer out.  But you have to do your homework, you don’t want to stay in sixth grade another year, do you?”

“No.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Did you tell Mom yet?”

“Nah, I’ll talk to her when we get home, try to soften the blow and all.”

“Thanks Mendel.”

“Of course, kid.  And hey, I’ll help you out with the work if I can, sound good?”

“Yeah, sounds good.”

When they got back to the house Mendel stopped Jason before they could walk in and pulled him into a tight hug.

“What was that for?” Jason asked.

“Just keep being you, alright?”

Jason nodded and Mendel smiled.

“Alright, time for dinner,” Mendel said, leading the way into the house.

* * *

 **iii. (January 1981)**  
  
Ms. Johnson sighed as she stared at the kid in front of her.  Jason had been a confusing case the past few years; usually a perfect student except for a few rare incidents which had resulted in parental intervention.

“Jason, why-“

Jason cut Ms. Johnson off, “It was an accident.”

“So you mean to tell me that you mistakenly snuck into the fourth period gym class?”

“I got my classes messed up.”

“In January?”

Jason nodded.

“Jason, usually this wouldn’t be a big deal, but the teacher said he’s caught you in that class before. I know, it can be confusing at this age, but you can’t skip class to go to gym, even if there is a pretty girl in the gym class.”

Jason blushed.

“I do have to call your parents, since this isn’t your first offense.”

Jason nodded and waited as Ms. Johnson called the Weisenbachfeld home to no answer, and then called Marvin’s apartment.

“Marvin Shapiro,”

“Hi yes Mr. Shapiro this is Ms. Johnson? I have Jason here, we need you to come in.”

“Is he ok?”

“He’s fine, he’s fine, it’s just a small issue with skipping class.”

“I’ll be right there,” Marvin said hanging up the phone and heading down to the school.

Ms. Johnson awaited the arrival of the stylish man from last year, while Jason sat wondering how to explain the situation to Marvin.  He almost wished Mendel was coming to pick him up, since Mendel would probably be more understanding, although Marvin did break up a marriage to chase the object of his attraction so, maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as Jason thought.

“Hello?” Marvin said, knocking lightly on the door before coming in, “Jason, why are you skipping class?”

“Excuse me, sir? Who are you?”

“Marvin Shapiro,” Marvin responded sticking out his hand and straightening his back a bit.

“I met Mr. Shapiro last year,” Ms. Johnson answered, avoiding Marvin’s hand.

“You probably met my ex-wife’s new husband, Mendel.”

“No, I met him as well, but I met you last September. You were taller, with more hair.”

Marvin felt the sinking feeling in his gut that happened whenever Whizzer came up, but still looked to Jason for confirmation.

“Whizzer came to pick me up,” Jason answered, “He was at the apartment and Ms. Johnson called and-“

“I’m sorry, so _you_ are Jason’s father?” Ms. Johnson interrupted, “And _who_ was the other man?”

“He was….my friend,” Marvin replied.

Ms. Johnson shook her head in confusion, “I didn’t think I needed to ask _which_ father of Jason’s I was getting when I called, but apparently, I was mistaken.  Now, to get to the business at hand…”

Ms. Johnson continued on about how Jason had been skipping class and Marvin looked appropriately upset and agreed to talk to Jason about it before taking him home.

“Hey, kid,” Marvin asked on their way out, “Why did Whizzer come pick you up that day?”

“I threw a book at Charlie York’s head.”

“You did _what_?” Marvin exclaimed.

“He said that I was going to end up ‘fucked in the head’ like you, and I just wanted him to stop.”

Marvin stayed silent for a moment and then asked in a controlled calm voice, “What did Whizzer do about it?”

“He bought me ice cream,” Jason said quietly, waiting for Marvin to explode about how irresponsible Whizzer was, but Marvin only chuckled.

“I hope it was a double scoop.”

Jason smiled at his dad and the two walked out of the school and out to the car.  


**Author's Note:**

> Please comment/leave kudos if you like it, and you can find me on tumblr at jasonsbarmitzvah!


End file.
